Happy Valentine's Day~

And here it is, smack dab in the middle of February, every single year. The day to drop your New Year's Resolutions so you can eat dessert, open presents from your hunny and announce to the world how much you’re in love!!

ugh....

I hate Valentine's Day.

I haven't always, but this year I hate it. I definitely didn't like it in high school, I didn't have a boyfriend and boy did those high school kids sure like to make a scene out of there

"Week and a half" romances.

In college,

Valentine's Day was great, either you spent it with a boyfriend or getting drunk and having dinner with your best girlfriends- either way it was a win!

And then came marriage.

And it is sure nice knowing I have an automatic date every February the 14th. I hate crowds and long lines so we never go out for dinner. I prefer to stay home and cook anyways.

Last year was a success. I even decorated the house with tons of stuff from a party store.  Balloons, confetti, table cloth with hearts, decorative plates...the works!

And for the kids?! Oh man! Ms. Lena always goes full force for Valentine's Day! I usually get balloons and treats and decorations; it's a site!

But this year, I am just not into it. I didn't get the boys I nanny anything (which I feel super bad about). We haven't finished any of our Valentine's crafts, and I'm not even making the husband and I dinner! (Although that has more to do with the diets we are both on)

I came downstairs to some gorgeous peach colored roses, which right there tells you that I'm being a spoiled little brat. But regardless of that this year is pretty disappointing and I know why.

I should be half way through a cycle of IVF today. The husband and I had planned a pre-baby moon trip for this upcoming weekend. Since we never did take a honeymoon, this would have been our first real vacation. We were going to rent a cabin in the Smokey Mountains and the three of us (Charlie Brown included) were going to relax and unwind.

It was my husband’s idea if you can even believe it! He said I would be under a lot of stress with the cycle, so a nice weekend away would certainly help.

Instead he is flying home to visit his family this weekend, his father recently had a heart attack and J wants to make sure everyone is doing all right.

I'm glad he gets to visit his family and I am looking forward to a quiet weekend alone to catch up on schoolwork, cleaning and crafting. But it still doesn't mean I've forgotten about what could have been...

Ok pity party over!! I need to remember how lucky I am to have a wonderful husband and the many blessings life has given me.

I have a lot of people who love me and for that I am going to put away the grumps and wish anyone who actually reads this a: